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I'm Done..

14K views 84 replies 52 participants last post by  Darbinco 
#1 ·
*****WARNING*****

****Profanity laced rant, if your soft.. bail out now****

I just did the last in-home service on my bike. I don't need problems like this in my life.

First off when I pulled the plug from the sump the oil rushed out like it was under pressure. It hit the pan and splashed out in a radius larger than my piece of cardboard I had under the catch pan.. f****n oil all over the place.. I got 4 quarts in the f****n pan and 1 quart on the garage floor. I don't know why, it's never done this before.

Then.. I use the piece of foil under the filter to keep the oil contained while removing the filter. It somehow flowed in behind it and managed to get all over the f****n exhaust.. in my haste I used the seat for balance to get up off the floor.. yup.. I got g******d oil on my Sunbrella Russell seat..

I go to pour the oil from the pan into my recycle jug.. yup, oil all over the place, running down the sides of the f****n jug, wind blowing it all over the place... ****. What kind of azzhole designers these POS pans that won't pour decently? At least I had enough brains to take it out into the dirt.. of the 4 quarts in the pan I managed to get 3 of them in jug, 1 quart in the dirt...

I passed on the rear diff fluid today.. Can you guess why?

Then I spend the next f*****n 2-1/2 hours jacking around with the GS-911 trying to get it to work.. (WiFi connection as I don't have a laptop to plug in direct) I did everything I could to get it to work, no dice. It would connect then disconnect. I would pair it with my phone then it would disconnect. I would pair it with my iPad, same f*****n thing. I updated the firmware.. yea that was a no go as well. If I wasn't partners with Chris on this f*****n thing I would smash it with a hammer, run it over with the neighbors lawn mower then burn what was left of ****-sucker. This thing is a PITFA every time I use it. The last two times I got it to work, not this time. I give up.. I'm just going to keep looking at the service reminder.. I'm so far past giving a chit at this point.

Tomorrow's task is changing the air filter.. I've not personally done it yet so.. any guesses as to how f****n well that's going to go?

Next time this SOB need an oil change someone else is going to do it. I can afford shop labor prices for the once a year I need it done.

Geeezuuzzz I need a f****n vacation.....

Picture included of oil all over the place for full effect..
 

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#37 ·
:surprise: All I have to say is: "POOR ALICE!!!" Hope she went shopping or something................
 
#40 ·
Darb, sometimes I'm convinced I'm haunted by spirits who like to make things go wrong and get a good laugh out of it...sometimes there's just no explanation for the crap that happens, but I've been known to throw a wrench or two in frustration, then I get to patch the drywall in the garage! About then I grab a beer or two and things really go south, but by then I don't give a f***! BTW, vent hose is only thing I can think of that might possibly cause the pressure problem...never experienced that myself nor read about it. Better luck with the air filter change...be careful with those screws!
 
#42 ·
I for one did not laugh at your story, I guess because I've been there and feel your pain.

Food for thought If you had problems servicing your bike and you've done it before do you really want a mechanic who has never done it to work on your bike instead of a trained BMW mechanic just to save an extra 12 mile drive?

Also if you do get the GS911 working set your service interval to 99,000km and keep a mileage record in a note book then you won't have to mess with that little grey wrench icon.
 
#53 ·
That's funny.. my dog was laying in the garage overseeing the task as hand, you know supervising.

When I started raising my voice when things got sideways. She got up took one look at me as if to say.. your on your own with this.. I'll be outside!
 
#46 ·
Sorry Darby. I had the neatest oil change last time, because I stripped the secondary drain plug (with RL ready to replace it just not installed yet). It’s always something, but usually satisfying when you get it all back together.

As for Gs911 WiFi issues, I’ve heard from Duane it’s a weak range setup and laptop has to be right next to it. But I’ve never done it personally.

Hope you’re feeling better.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
#47 ·
Regarding GS911, it only uses 2.4GHZ.
Its receiver may not have that good of range compared to some of your other devices. I have sometimes had trouble with reception in my garage, I plan to rebuild the physical topology of my wireless network in the house at some point to resolve any dropped signal issues.
The setup portion of it is not the most user-friendly of devices I've tried but at least it worked without me having to whine to tech support.
 
#55 ·
Sadly once the device is licensed, it does not permit the advanced functions away from broadband.
I did get a kick out of plugging it in and walking into my office and remotely triggering various subsystems remotely.

If I had continued down the BMW road I would have likely built myself a tiny PC box for use in the garage to do stuff like that. I still might, I have one half built for an acquaintance that is 4"x6"x6" who asked me to do it. I do not claim authority in IT matters but I'm pretty good at it and did attend college for it.
 
#57 ·
For your GS-911 problem, mine wouldn't work properly either when trying to reset the maintenance date and mileage. Turned out to be they updated the software for winblows. Updated the software and everything is good now. Just chalk up that oil change to **** happens. Take the bike for a long ride on a twisty road and that day will fade away.
 
#58 ·
For those considering a garage PC, I bought an older model of a similar unit a year ago for various bike updates that didn’t have Mac versions (as my home pc is Mac and my work laptop mac... I needed an alt and had an extra monitor, kB, mouse, etc laying around)

It works surprisingly well if you’re not in a hurry and do one thing at a time. And for ~$100, hard to beat.

I’ve updated PMD60, Uniden R1, and EZCan with it.

ACEPC T8 Fanless Mini PC,Intel x5-Z8350 HD Graphics Mini Desktop Computer,Windows 10 64-bit,DDR3 2GB 32GB eMMC,4K HD,Dual Band WiFi AC,Bluetooth 4.2 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07D9YX3W6/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_-595CbETPSNFB


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
#59 ·
I had a similar experience with my sprinter RV. A simple fuel filter change turned into a week long (waiting for parts to ship), $300 project. Probably 4 hours of actual labor. For reference, a "normal" fuel filter change should be $100 and an hour. You can read all about it at the sprinter forum!! It was one of THOSE projects. Of course, this was all the week before the TTD event, so time was starting to work against me.
 
#62 ·
My last oil change before the TTD was much like your experience...oil exploding all over the place. I'm going to rig up some cardboard sides to my oil pan to help avoid this in the future.

My Subaru Outback is by far the easiest and quickest oil change ever. FuelMoto quick drain plug means oil flows directly into the pan with the short hose, and with the oil filter on the top of the engine, I can do the change in less that 10 minutes with no mess!!
 
#65 ·
I am a very skilled mechanic... I agree and feel your pain... 90% of the time in the air filter is taking off the plastic... If you use a K&N you should be able to go around 10-15k miles before cleaning and re oiling it....
Geo
 
#69 ·
Update.
Cleaned the bike yesterday and found one of my windshield trim screw holes was broke. I used some hi-tech superglue to repair it. Don't know how long it will last but we're going for it.

It also means that there's a high probibility of something else going wrong when I do the air filter replacement. I can't afford that right before a week long trip so it's going to have to wait.
 
#71 ·
Darb, take a deeeeep breath. It'll all blow over (someday) and you'll laugh about it with friends over drinks. Soon, I hope.
Some days just go to he** and there's nothing you can do about it. I'm sure many members of this forum feel your pain (and have had similar days).
Rant away, get it out, you're among friends.
Clay
 
#74 ·
Been off grid for a few days and just finished up reading this thread. That ranks right up there with having a fairly straight forward task blowing up into a nightmare. For the been there, done that crowd it's an entertaining read except for the stain on the seat. Sure hope you can get that reminder mark out.

Next time, just fire that über smoker of yours up and use the bartering system. Smoked brisket and pork in exchange for an oil/ filter service call, resumé required. If you smoke it, they will come. From afar! Put me on the list!!
 
#77 ·
I used to wrench my old 1980 Datsun. I consider my self reasonably capable with many tools. However, since I bought my '03 M3, and then the '13 GTL, I have taken to not doing much maintenance work on either...mostly for one reason...not screwing up the warranty, especially since I bought extensions for each.
To me, the GTL has too many body parts and pieces, especially to get them all back together again. Considering that even the factory shop periodically misses a screw into the tupperware.

The hourly wages assures that I have recourse for any problems. And for a $23k bike, that's truly cheap insurance and peace of mind.
 
#78 ·
You know for me it's just that I simply do not enjoy doing it anymore. There's a few things I would like to do but I just don't have the desire to tear into it. I've never installed a new horn because... well.. I'd rather sandpaper the azzhole of an alligator in a telephone booth than to take the time and tear into my bike and do it

I used to do all that stuff and more when I had my Harley's. I'd would do my own fluids, stereos, amps, speakers, pipes, mufflers, air cleaners and even installed and programmed a ThunderMax ECU on one bike. Not anymore, seems when I left that world for a bike that runs good off the showroom floor my interest for wrenching was lost as well.
 
#81 ·
I know Darby enough that I know he isn't that stupid. I don't think.
Best.
 
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